Check out the best times to sleep train below.
Wondering where these good and bad periods to sleep train come from? Look at my Bedtiming Book Review. I'm not going to go into any more detail than that. If you are interested, I suggest you get the book Bedtiming
. It has great in depth information about each developmental stage your child will go through up until age 4 and why each of these stages is a good or bad time to sleep train. Enjoy my professional writing skills below...
0 to 2.5 months - not so good
2.5 to 4 months - good
4 to 5.5 months - not so good
5.5 to7.5 months - ideal
8 to11 months - really not so good
12 to 16 months - good
17 to 21 months - not so good
22 to 27 months - good
28 months to 3 years - not so good
3 to 3.5 years - good
3.5 to 4 years - not so good
**The ages listed above correspond with your child's due date**
Wondering where these good and bad periods to sleep train come from? Look at my Bedtiming Book Review. I'm not going to go into any more detail than that. If you are interested, I suggest you get the book Bedtiming
. It has great in depth information about each developmental stage your child will go through up until age 4 and why each of these stages is a good or bad time to sleep train. Enjoy my professional writing skills below...0 to 2.5 months - not so good
2.5 to 4 months - good
4 to 5.5 months - not so good
5.5 to7.5 months - ideal
8 to11 months - really not so good
12 to 16 months - good
17 to 21 months - not so good
22 to 27 months - good
28 months to 3 years - not so good
3 to 3.5 years - good
3.5 to 4 years - not so good
**The ages listed above correspond with your child's due date**
Thanks for such an informative site! However, I am a bit overwhelmed with all this good information. If a sleep training isn't so good during the 1 to 2.5 month old, what do you do? I have a 2 month old and we accidentally have him addicted to his swing to be able to sleep. I return to work in 3 weeks and need to figure out how to get him to take naps without it. I've been reading several different books for help and can't seem to find a good starting place that doesn't involve crying it out. Do you have any suggestions? Thank you1
ReplyDeleteI think the suggestions above are just guidelines. You can sleep train any time, but you MIGHT have more success (less crying, occures quicker and is easier to do) if you go with the times listed above. Notice the might. Every baby is different and I also can't say that their assumptions are for sure correct. Also, and they mention this in their book, some easy or angel babies will probably do well with sleep training at any given time.
ReplyDeleteSo you've got 3 weeks. No crying methods will most likely take longer to work so keep that in mind but, depending on your baby, you might be able to get there by then.Is there a reason that you can't use the swing in case your little one isn't able to sleep without it in 3 weeks time?
First, make sure you have a good pre-sleep routine. I would suggest trying to put your lo down sleepy but not asleep, even if you are putting him rigth into the sling just so he gets used to things. I suggest the baby whisperer 4 s routine. great for newborns. Work on good waktimes (look under blog index for post)
I would start off using the swing at a slower speed over time until you can use it with it off. Then you can work on transitioning out of the swing. At this point (or if the slowing down of the swing doesn't work) I would suggest you move onto some of the babywhisperer suggestions or some variation of them. You could also look over the No Cry Sleep Solution too. Look in the blog index. You may need to stay near your little guy and help him drift off to sleep or almost to sleep for a while, slowly decreasing how long/much help you give him. Some people will shush/pat (look for post) or stroke babies face. Baby might cry while you do this, but you will be by his side. Takes a lot of work but things get better eventually! In the index at the bottom there is a section titled sleep training and methods to help your baby sleep. Other things in this section might help. Good luck!
Thank you for pointing me the right direction! I wasn't so sure about the swing use after I return to work since he'll be going to daycare. I was worried that he'd start daycare, not have a swing, sleep little during the day which would mean tough nights of sleep. Do you have any posts on how to help them sleep without their swaddle? Or is it something you'd just go for in one big go - teach him to fall asleep on his own unswaddled? Thank you again!!
ReplyDeleteLisa C.
ReplyDeleteHere is a swaddling post. I wouldn't drop the swaddle before it is totally necessary. I have heard of some day cares not allowing it d/t some silly reasons/regulations.
http://www.mybabysleepguide.com/2009/01/swaddling.html
Many day cares do have swings. Maybe you have already checked into that though. Not saying you shouldn't try and drop the swing habit, just pointing that out :) Day care can be rough. Baby doesn't sleep much or only sleeps in the swing or others arms creating a rough situation for the evenings. Hopefully it'll go smoothly though. At least you'll have a baby that will learn to sleep in an environment with commotion. That's always been a problem with my kiddos. They just want to play if they can see or hear something going on.
Phew! Knowing I don't have to stop swaddling too really helps. I'll just tackle having him learn to fall asleep on his own. It's just now a matter of actually doing it and sticking to it. I hope to break the swing habit in time for day care. I've been looking into if they'll allow a swing if the transition isn't going as smoothly (and knowing babies, it may not) as I hoped.
ReplyDeleteThank you SO SO much for your help. Your site is amazing and has given me a lot to think about. I am so happy I stumbled across it. Also, thank you for taking the time to answer my questions. I know how busy life is and I appreciate it.
Lisa C.
ReplyDeleteYou're welcome. Good luck!
I hope Lisa C can tell what happened to her trying to wean her kid out of the swing because I have the same issue except my son just turned 4 months and the swing's motor is starting to burn out. Yikes!
ReplyDeleteSlick,
ReplyDeleteSome kids transition very easily once they get past the newborn stage. Some probably go through some kind of tough transitional phase. I know of some parents that turn the swing on to a lower speed over time until it isn't on at all. THen they transition baby to a crib. Baby might still protest, but if you do it gradually, there will likely be less protest.
Just wanted to say that we used this info one year ago to train our then-12-month-old to sleep and it worked wonders! At 10.5 mos old we were pulling our hair out after 3 weeks of highly unsuccessful sleep training (read: torture for the whole family multiple times a day, no sleeping), and when I read this I decided to try waiting til the recommended 12 months old. After doing that, in 2 days she went to sleep all by herself with out a peep. She is now a terrific sleeper at age 2! Thank you so much!
ReplyDeleteKatie,
ReplyDeleteThat is great to hear that it worked for you! I love hearing feedback from others.
Rachel
Hey Lisa, is it too late??
ReplyDeleteI have a 15 mo daughter who just can not sleep with our being rocked. It all started with the colic where nothing but rocking would calm her down, and since she was our first, we continued it praying she'd eventually outgrow it. Well, child #2 is here, and she didn't. We have coslept from the beginning, and she wakes up about 2-4 times during the night, sometimes going down with hush/pat, at other times requiring rocking.
I tried modified CIO, when she was 13 mo and I was 8 month pregnant. Stayed by her side, hush/pat, PU/PD, but after giving it a week, failed. Tonight I'm starting training with a twist of my own. I rocked her until she was drowsy but not asleep, put her down in the crib, where she got excited for a while and played for about 10 mins. Dim lights, white noise, me hushing, tried to make her lie down but she wouldn't stay. so stepped back and let her CIO for 5 minutes. she finally went to sleep after 10 minutes of patting.
So my basic plan is to slowly decrease the amount of rocking, put her down less and less drowsy every night and hopefully hopefully not let her CIO too much. My question to you is what to do when she wakes up in the MOTN? Rock her until drowsy? Or not take her out of her crib at all?
Sorry for the long rant. Please advice
Mareeya,
ReplyDeleteThat is great that you have figured out a method that works for the two of you. I would keep up the consistency bd try to make sure you don't seem hesitant in your approach (in other wards, decide unde what conditions you stay nd go and follow through--if you keep coming back thinking maybe you should double check her etc then you will likely struggle with success--I hope that made sense!)
Sorry sorry, my computer is being weird right now so sorry for split comments and odd auto correct ect. You have a few options with the waking at night. Many kids will stop he night waking all by themselves several days after they learn to go to sleep well on their own so one method that people choose is to sleep train t bedtime but rock back to sleep(or whatever) in the middle of the night. This doesn't always work and sometimes parents don't want to wait it out. Another method would be to rock until drowsy but I would try the shushing in the crib first. And remember to not run in! I would also consider waiting a few minutes before going in regardless--just as you do after the bedtime routine.
DeleteRachel
I just read this book and saw no mention of this being based on due date as opposed to birth date. Do you recall where you read that? I know "Wonder Weeks" works by due date, but does this book really follow that?
ReplyDeleteI read the book a while ago and can't remember where it talks about adjusted age, sorry. But even without finding it in the book, it makes sense that they go by adjusted age as a baby's development follows certain steps when they are young and this is by adjusted age. After a couple years it is generally the same regardless of adjusted age.
DeleteHey Rachel -
ReplyDeleteI have a 4 month old post-colic baby boy who also has silent reflux (is being medicated and seems to be under control for now), and a milk/soy intolerance. I am a nursing mother so I have gone dairy/soy free in my diet but with all this in his little life we have had sleep issues since he was 2 weeks old. For months he had to sleep on my chest and be rocked for his naps, but thankfully I slowly got him to where he would sleep in his crib at nights and some naps. I still nurse/rock him to sleep and he was doing ok with this at night. Naps are so inconsistent and one day he'll take 3 naps (2 of 2 hours and 1 of 45 minutes late in afternoon), but then the next he won't sleep more than 30 minutes at a time. At night he was getting up 2 times to feed and settling really easy, but unfortunately we seem to have regressed and things are all over the place right now. I was beginning to think because I was having to nurse/rock him to sleep every time that this is why we are having issues and it was time to sleep train. From the above post it says the IDEAL time would be 5 1/2 - 7 1/2 months. Do you think I should just try and make it through till that time? I am beginning to feel so sleep deprived but I do feel he won't be an easy "trainee". I just need someone else's thoughts here. I did Weissbluth (total extinction)with my daughter when she was 7 1/2 months and of course it was easy then. The reason I am wanting to do something now is because I do have a 3 year old to take care of during the day. I appreciate any advice you may have. Hope you are able to understand my post - running on little sleep this morning!
Abbey,
ReplyDeleteMy sister also did dairy/soy free while nursing and it was such a huge transition at first--it's stressful to figure out what to eat when you're already so busy taking care of a baby! Congrats for sticking with it!
Personally, I think 4 months is a time that most kids do ok with sleep training. Yes, they're developing quite a bit right now, but they still usually do ok--and if you don't do anything until 6 months, sleep will likely get worse if that's the trend already, and you'll have others issues--like teeth and physical developmental leaps--to deal with then.
A lot of changes happen at 4 months that makes sleep often to awry. Babies start to get distracted by their environment and the 'old tricks' often stop working. I personally feel fine starting more intense cio at this age, especially if mom is feeling at the end of her rope and doesn't think she can keep this up. 4 months is a long time to go with little sleep--and a long time to spend helping a baby sleep over and over and over again! Think over the positives and negatives of each option and see what you feel best doing--then be consistent! Best of luck! Let me know how it goes!
Hi Rachel-
ReplyDeleteI know 7 weeks is too early to begin sleep training, but we would really like to start good habits and stretch my little ones sleep a little longer. He currently is in bed between 8-9 pm, dreamfeed around 1030, but is waking at 130 and 430. He has had a few nights with 4-5 hour stretches so we know he can do it. Any suggestions to help with consistency?
Jenstewart,
DeleteAt this age, many babies will drop the cluster feeding in the pm. I usually did a cluster feed, but just one. I'd do something like this. Feed (followed by naps) at 7 am, 10 am, 1 pm, 4 pm, 6 pm 9 pm. This was a preference thing. I liked to get a little cluster feed in, but a longer period right before sleep to get longer sleep (especially bc I didn't do the df with my last baby) and then it helped me go to bed early. I could never get myself to bed at like 7 or 8, but I could get myself to bed after the 9 pm feeding. So anyway, this got me much more sleep. Once baby slept a little bit longer at night, I moved back to feeds more like at 7 am, 10, 1, 4, 7. My babies slept longer relatively early, so this didn't last terribly long--otherwise I might move bedtime earlier sooner.
Your routine sounds fine. You can try dropping that last cluster feed (if he doesn't seem very hungry) and see if it helps things out. Sometimes it causes more issues with extra cluster feeds in the evening.
Some babies will go back and forth with their feeds, overall (hopefully!) heading in the right direction. It can be a bit frustrating. Generally a little time (assuming good sleep habits are in place) results in a longer time between feeds more consistently. You can help things along by trying to hold him off with a feed (by a pacifier or whatever), making sure to not rush in with a feed (give him a few minutes to see if he'll go back to sleep--and you try to do the same thing too!), and decreasing how much you feed at some of the earlier feeds. You can also do something like the Core night method if you're feeling like you need some change quick or else! I'll go ahead and cross post this to your other question bc they were somewhat similar. Let me know if I missed something.
Best of luck, Rachel
Hi Rachel,
ReplyDeleteThank you for all the good information. I have a question concerning the time to sleep train. I have sleep trained my baby when she was between 4-6 months old to sleep over night and she does well with it, only that she needed to be nursed to sleep. Then during her 6 to 8 months, there were a lot of changes happening in the family and her sleep pattern was totally disrupted. Now she is 9 months old and she sleeps really little in the day time (from 3 naps to 2 naps, from 1.5-3 hours each time before to 45 minutes to 1 hour each time now). She still sleeps around 11 hours in the night. Is that normally for her to sleep that little in the day time? In addition, she can sleep by herself in her bed in the daytime, but she wakes up 2-3 times in the evening and have to be taken to my bed to be nursed to sleep (which often ends up co-sleeping with me as I fall asleep nursing her). If I don't take her, she can cry hours and vomit in her bed. I am really tired of co-sleeping with her and nursing her to sleep during the night. Since 8 to 11 months is not good time to sleep train, I'm thinking of restarting the sleep training afterwards, particularly getting her to sleep by herself in the evening (on her own bed in a separate room). But when she will be 15 months, there will be another major change of life in the family (moving to another country, no grandparents anymore), so I wonder if it is good to start before 15 months or after. And if after, is it good to use the life changing event as a natural time to separate bed? Would the change be too stressful that I should even postpone the training to a later time? Looking forward to your reply. Thank you!
I think I'm doing too much reading lol - now I'm confused :) According to this book 5.5-7.5 months is an ideal time to ST, but then according to the Wonder Weeks this would be in the middle of a Leap! Trying to figure out when to start with my 5.5 month old.
ReplyDeleteJakobsmom,
DeleteI know, it totally gets confusing. If your little one doesn't seem to be in a rough spot, go ahead and ST if you're up for it :)
Do you know if any particular methods are supposedly better-suited for the 2.5-4 month window, developmentally? As reviewed in Bedtiming or in your own experience?
ReplyDeleteThanks Rachel :)
Rebekah, I have a 3-6 month sleep guide post that has some of my reccomendations.
Deleterachel
Hope I get an answer. My baby is 7 months, usually sleeps through the night without any feeds and gets good naps, but I get him to go to sleep by swinging him in a hummock. When he is asleep, I put him in his crib and sleeps wihout problems. But should I stop using the hummock? Is it going to stop him from having good sleep habits?
ReplyDeletejorgeytere7,
DeleteGoing to sleep in a hammock might end up causing issues later on, but it may not. If things are going well now you might want to keep them the same but be aware that they could cause issues later (most likely taking FOREVER to fall asleep with assistance) and if this happens, you'll have to make changes then. Or you could try slowly decreasing how much you use the hammock before sleep (having him less asleep over time) and see if he is able to end up falling asleep on his own without it- hopefully this would be stress free for the two of you.